In Anticipation
In anticipation of Christmas
My darling child
Has become an insomniac
Staying up all hours to sticker
His books
And waking in the night;
Singing carols,
Arranging gifts around the tree,
Laughing like Santa, with a ho-ho-ho
Dreaming of footsteps on the roof
Dancing
In anticipation
Of the joy, the surprise
His first remembering
And this time shared
His memories of Christmas.
I wonder occasionally
If I will survive
Hearing his little voice in the night
As it breaks the silence
Like an electric shock to my system:
Mama, mama —
Just as I am drifting into the abyss
The sweet darkness of sleep
And there
A little voice
Calling me.
But I try to remember
The magic
Of the Christmas lights around the tree
The sacred stillness
After hours and avoiding sleep
Bridging the worlds between,
A child in the world of his parents’ making
The beauty of the world
Unfolding
And magic all around.